BEFORE BOOTCAMP
I hate exercise. There, I've said it. The very thought of putting on a tracksuit and going for a run or hitting the gym makes me break out in a cold sweat. I have trainers in a box in my wardrobe which have never actually been on my feet. However, I know that if I want to fit into anything in my wardrobe after Christmas and look after my health long-term, I'm going to have to get over my exercise phobia and get moving.
I hate exercise. There, I've said it. The very thought of putting on a tracksuit and going for a run or hitting the gym makes me break out in a cold sweat. I have trainers in a box in my wardrobe which have never actually been on my feet. However, I know that if I want to fit into anything in my wardrobe after Christmas and look after my health long-term, I'm going to have to get over my exercise phobia and get moving.
And I think I've found a solution - Frame's Emergency Bootcamp. Now a bootcamp might seem a little extreme for someone who only ever breaks into a jog to catch the nightbus home after a late night, but I think it could be just what I need. Plus it's not a scary military-style bootcamp; it's held at the uber-trendy Frame studios in Shoreditch, east London.
The Emergency Bootcamp is designed for people who are short of time and need results fast, so I'm in for a gruelling-sounding two weeks of exercise classes. But at least they sound fun - everything from 'Bend it Like Barbie' to 'Jane Fonda Tribute' is on offer - enough even to tempt the laziest girl off the sofa (ie, me).
Bootcamp begins on January 4 and I'll be blogging every day on Fabulousmag.co.uk to keep you up to date with my progress. In the meantime, I'll be making the most of my last few days of laziness and gluttony over the festive season. Merry Christmas everyone!
BOOTCAMP DAY 1
So I haven't actually started exercising yet, but this morning saw me braving the icy pavements of Shoreditch to pay my first visit to Frame for my initial consultation.
So I haven't actually started exercising yet, but this morning saw me braving the icy pavements of Shoreditch to pay my first visit to Frame for my initial consultation.
Next stop - the mildly humiliating weigh-in on the metaboliser machine. This scary contraption takes all sorts of readings to tell you how much of your body is made up of fat, muscle, water and bone. The verdict? I'm basically all fat and bone - mortifying!
I'm also quite dehydrated and carry more weight on my lower half, but it's not all bad news - my vital organs (heart, lungs, kidneys) don't have much fat around them - which is a good thing. One other thing in my favour is that I don't smoke, so even though I'm seriously unfit, my lung capacity isn't too bad!
As predicted, I've put on a few pounds over the Christmas holidays (that'll be the whole selection box I ate on Boxing Day, then), but I feel confident! The aim over the next two weeks, apart from squeezing into my skinny jeans again, is to reduce my metabolic age (a measurement of how efficiently your body converts calories into energy), which shockingly is 44 years (I'm 29!), plus increase the proportion of muscle in my body and tone up some of my more flabby parts too!
Here are the stats, and my targets. Keep your fingers crossed for me and log on tomorrow to find out how the first dreaded exercise class goes...
VITAL STATISTICS:Metabolic Age: 44
Height: 5ft 4
Weight: 9st 12lb
Waist: 29 inches
Hips: 42 inches
Bust: 34 inches
Dress size: 10-12
Body Fat: 37.4% (healthy is 21 - 33%)
Water: 46.2% (healthy is between 45 - 60%)
Height: 5ft 4
Weight: 9st 12lb
Waist: 29 inches
Hips: 42 inches
Bust: 34 inches
Dress size: 10-12
Body Fat: 37.4% (healthy is 21 - 33%)
Water: 46.2% (healthy is between 45 - 60%)
TARGET:Metabolic Age: 29
Weight: 9st 6lb
Waist: 27 inches
Hips: 40 inches
Bust: 34 inches
Dress size: 10
Body Fat: 33%
Water: 50%
Weight: 9st 6lb
Waist: 27 inches
Hips: 40 inches
Bust: 34 inches
Dress size: 10
Body Fat: 33%
Water: 50%
BOOTCAMP DAY 2
This morning was my first bootcamp class and I wanted to cry when I dragged myself out of bed and into my workout gear (an ancient pair of jogging bottoms and a tatty T-shirt). But I made it to the studio and before I knew it, I was standing on my very own mini trampoline, performing various jumps and twists and trying not to bounce off it into a wall!
This morning was my first bootcamp class and I wanted to cry when I dragged myself out of bed and into my workout gear (an ancient pair of jogging bottoms and a tatty T-shirt). But I made it to the studio and before I knew it, I was standing on my very own mini trampoline, performing various jumps and twists and trying not to bounce off it into a wall!
Pumping house music and our brilliantly hyper instructor Joan Murphy kept the class' spirits up (I didn't quite manage to sing along to Katy Perry's I Kissed A Girl, but I mustered a smile through gritted teeth). Even though I thought I might pass out or throw up several times during the half hour class, I made it to the end intact! We did some stretches (which hurt - I am not remotely flexible) and that was it - bootcamp done for the day.
Doing an early morning class might be brutal, but at least it gets it out of the way and although I don't quite believe the people who say exercise gives them more energy, that might change over the next few days as I start to get fitter - hopefully!
BOOTCAMP DAY 3
It felt a bit easier to get up this morning, but struggling through the icy snow to my first ever Vibe class wasn't exactly a fun experience! Luckily, once I was there and being introduced to the scary-looking contraption by my instructor, Naomi, I soon got into the swing of things.
It felt a bit easier to get up this morning, but struggling through the icy snow to my first ever Vibe class wasn't exactly a fun experience! Luckily, once I was there and being introduced to the scary-looking contraption by my instructor, Naomi, I soon got into the swing of things.
The Vibe machine is like a Power Plate - you stand on a small platform perform various exercises while the machine vibrates beneath - it's meant to increase the effectiveness of your exercises and give you a more intense workout. I did squats, lunges, sit-ups, press-ups and boxing - while my whole body was buzzing and vibrating in a rather strange - but nice - way!
After 25 minutes of pain, I gave up completely, whining "I can't do it, it's too hard!" at my instructor, Naomi. But then came the fun part - you get to lie on the machine and let it massage your aching muscles - cool!
I can't say I'm quite enjoying this exercise lark just yet, but the fact that each session is only half an hour makes it just about bearable, and after discovering my shocking metabolic age (44!) I know I need to commit to getting fit for the sake of my health. The lazy years are officialy OVER.
BOOTCAMP DAY 4
Today, every single part of me hurts. Muscles I didn't even know I had have been used for the first time and my body is protesting. I can barely walk, let alone work out, so how on earth am I going to manage another Vibe class tonight?
Today, every single part of me hurts. Muscles I didn't even know I had have been used for the first time and my body is protesting. I can barely walk, let alone work out, so how on earth am I going to manage another Vibe class tonight?
All I can say is, if after two weeks of this, if I haven't toned up and improved my fitness (and dropped a few pounds), I am going to be really disappointed!
BOOTCAMP DAY 5:
Shock horror: last night's Vibe class was actually fun and today I don't feel too bad at all! Maybe those lazy muscles are finally getting used to being worked and I might actually (gasp) be getting fitter. The true test will be tonight, when I do two classes back to back - cardio and another Vibe session.
Shock horror: last night's Vibe class was actually fun and today I don't feel too bad at all! Maybe those lazy muscles are finally getting used to being worked and I might actually (gasp) be getting fitter. The true test will be tonight, when I do two classes back to back - cardio and another Vibe session.
I'm also trying really hard to stick to a healthy diet - no carbs in the evening, just grilled chicken or fish with vegetables, and soup for lunch. I've become slightly obsessed with rye bread which is a healthy alternative to normal wheat bread but I'm missing wine and cheese. I have been allowing myself the odd treat (did you know there are 69 calories in a Ferrero Rocher?!) and the weird thing is, when I would have easily scoffed four chocs in a row without thinking about it, now just the one feels really satisfying. Perhaps my gluttony is finally under control!
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