Star Jessie Wallace last night broke her silence

EASTENDERS star Jessie Wallace last night broke her silence—and dramatically confessed her secret drug shame.

After years of rejecting accusations of cocaine-snorting, the TV favourite, who played Albert Square firebrand Kat Slater, opened her heart for the first time about her off-screen problems, admitting she DID take hard drugs and hit the booze with a vengeance as she struggled to cope with fame.

In an exclusive interview with the News of the World, Jessie said: "Yes, I've done drugs. But I'm not proud of it and it's in the past now."

Finally facing up to the truth the actress, who quit the hit soap at Christmas, also revealed how she:

STARTED on drugs out of curiosity to get a party buzz,

LIVED in fear of her terrible secret getting out,

BOOZED until it got "out of control" and

VOWED to quit the drugs after giving birth to daughter Tallulah.

Recalling how she first got into drugs, Jessie confessed: "I wanted to see what it was like. I've done it at parties and taken hard stuff with friends.

"But I've never been a complete druggie. It was a social thing for me. I regret it now." However she insisted she was always able to stop it affecting her work.

Trash

Jessie decided to come clean about her real-life dramas after ex-friends told stories alleging wild cocaine abuse and battles with the bottle.

Former fiancé Dave Morgan— 17-month-old Tallulah's dad—even claimed drink turned Jessie into a "monster" and she beat him up.

But the actress insisted: "I wasn't doing drugs all the time. I read one article that said I used to get them delivered through my door by a dealer.

"I mean, how far-fetched does that sound—getting drugs delivered like a pizza. That was made-up trash.

"I never took drugs in front of Dave, but I once told him that I did it and the fear that he'd talk about it has been hanging around my neck.

"I had to let people know the truth so I can put it all behind me.

"In the end, I didn't like the effect drugs had on me. You land up feeling s****y the next day and wish you hadn't done it—it's like having a terrible hang-over from drink. You feel down and cr*ppy."

In typical Kat style she added: "I tell you what, though—s****y ex-boyfriends make you feel terrible, too!"

Talking seriously again she went on: "I regret all of it and I don't ever want to do it again.

"That's not the kind of thing you can do when you have a young daughter. As a mum I worry about drugs. You see how they can wreck people's lives—and young people are particularly at risk.

"It worries me how easy they are to get hold of and it's so easy to get addicted."

But Jessie, 34, confessed it was terrible booze binges, not drugs, that got her in trouble at EastEnders.

The star has twice been convicted of drink-driving. The last time she was banned from the road for three years and narrowly avoided jail.

And three years ago she was suspended from EastEnders for two months after producers grew fed-up with her boozy off-screen antics.

Jessie admitted: "I was never an alcoholic but booze did cause me a lot of problems. For a period it was getting out of control. I went through a phase of not caring about what I did when I was drunk. The worst period was around the time of my suspension from the show.

"Every time I was drinking I got into trouble. I guess sometimes I did provoke it. Everywhere I went there was trouble, trouble, trouble...and then I was suspended.

"I wanted to get back in control and found it hard to cope. I had such a bad reputation. I shouldn't have got drunk in public places because that's when trouble started.

"I didn't change overnight but after a while I got to grips with booze. Obviously motherhood has helped a lot. I've got more important things to do now. When I used to drink I'd be rowdy, but people took it the wrong way. I was never up for a fight but I got into trouble.

Bitch

"There's that picture of me coming out of a club doing the can-can with Elaine Lordan (her ex-EastEnders co-star, axed as sister Lynn after her own booze problems).

"That haunted me for years. The reputation hung around me like a bad smell. It still won't go away now.

"You hear people saying, ‘Get a few drinks down her and she becomes the bitch from hell.' But they don't know me. I could be fiery, but I've calmed down a lot.

"There were so many stories about my boozing it was like that was all I had going on. I was ‘Wild Kat'—and I worried that people just saw me as this woman in the papers, forgetting I was actually an actress who occasionally went out and had a drink.

"Every time I saw my picture in a mag it said, ‘Boozy Jessie Wallace'. It was like my first name was ‘Boozy'. But I never let it interfere with my work. The suspension was about all the trouble away from the soap."

Jessie admitted she has a short-temper and added: "It gets worse when I'm boozing. I've always been a little firecracker. I occasionally get into situations where someone says something and I think, ‘Did they really say that?'

"In the past I'd answer back, but no more. I don't need the hassle. I've got Tallulah to worry about now. Having her was the turning point. I didn't drink at all in pregnancy.

"Now I like a glass of wine at home and I'll have a few with mates.

"Sometimes I feel like I should be living like a nun—but you've got to get on with your life."